Tending to life

work, work & more work

rain, rain & more rain

warm, sleepy & bored...

Its the sort of day I want to make a pot of colcannon & bratwurst smothered with currywurst- sit and veg with a football game, movie or play tomb raider. Curl up with Gormenghast and take a nap before BB. Not doing that though. Writing only because it is procrastination towards the work out. Procrastination is a pony trap. It is the voice of self hate saying that the life I'm working towards isn't for me. Screw procrastination. I'm going to work out. I think too I might be dehydrated or missing some vitamins or something like that. In this heat and with working out it's hard to judge.

Hit 129lbs - finally moving forward again - really shouldn't stop now. Off to do at least 2 miles...2miles is the new lazy? lol. That's progress.

Time to work out

Still 134 lbs...trying to come up with the energy to run for 5 miles. Much rather lay in a hammock & daydream but as I don't have a hammock any more I might as well work out.

Factoid: Lean people fidget for about 150 minutes a day more than obese people do. That kind of low-grade activity (tapping feet and fingers, twirling hair, gesturing while speaking, etc.) can burn 350 calories a day, which translates into 10-30 pounds a year!

Alternately you can burn 90 more calories an hour pacing than if you just talk while sitting still.

Wikihow to burn extra calories.

Update

Been pushing things at work & with the work out. Hit the wall today after a 5 mile trek last night followed by weight lifting, woke up today to do a quick 2 miles. Managed to clean the house, walked to the grocery store and voosh I ran out of energy like some one left the tap on.

I think it's the Alli pills. Honestly, I don't think I'm getting enough nutrition while I'm taking them. Also I noticed for the first time in my life - I am absolutely famished when I am done eating. I've never been like that - even when I was younger and was seriously fit I ate small portions and felt full. I'm attributing it to the Alli pills & I don't think I like it. Still I've made a commitment to give them a try and I'm going to follow through for at least a little while.

I'm officially 134.0 lbs exactly. WooHoo! One more pound gone - 34 MORE TO GO
My waist is 33 inches. UGH. Winces & Double winces.
Arms are 12 inches.

BMI 26.2

FACTOID: Before you reach for that candy bar, think about how far you're willing to go for it. How about a 2.87 mile walk? One mini peanut butter cup will cost you one third mile. A small brownie? A 26 minute run.

Find your Body Mass Index

My current BMI 26.4
When I started this new project of getting back to myself it was 27.9...
So there's progress already.

ALSO: FACTOID:

To lose 1 pound, you must burn 3500 excess calories

WTF, WTF & WTF

Weekend just past - did weights &

300 crunches

50 squats

8 miles

ate sparingly small portions of healthy food & drank a lake of water. So could some one please explain to me why the scale says in 24 hrs I gained 11 lbs? That's not even possible! That's not even fair!! I swear that is scale is possessed or demented or broken when it goes over a certain weight. There is no freaking way that I went from 129 to 140!

End of the longest week ever!

It was the longest week ever. Some how the week after the 4th of July & my birthday always feels forever long. Plus, there was a silly (READ: UTTERLY POINTLESS) meeting at the corp office this week which resulted in more money coming out of the paycheck for insurance. Every day at work this week was just like being kicked in the shins by a two year old wearing steel toed boots. But it is over now & I'm free to do whatever I want for two days.

Which is excersicing constantly - because if you believe 'the evil scale' which is probably broken I have gained another pound back. Excersicing, watching Big Brother & reading CIA books for research on the new novel. And not eating. And not smoking.

I'm enjoying watching the live feeds very much. Kind of like living with my big family & crazy brothers again in an odd way. I miss the sounds of a house full of people around me. I miss cooking for a bunch of guys who just dropped by. It's just not the same with out it. As much as I've been enjoying my solitude lately I'm begining to realize I really am a people person and need the energy provided by hanging out with people in person. It's interesting when you think one thing about yourself and find out something very different. I think that last relationship just soured me on the human race for a bit there ~ but now that the tide's going out there's a faith in human beings resurfacing. Maybe they aren't all liar/con artists who want to hurt other people? Well...here's to hoping any way.

A little depressed after the weeks end. Both the boys are out and I'm just realizing how much of my life I am seriously in need of retooling. It gets to be a monumentous task when you see the mountain ahead for the sheer size of climbing it. Sighs. Have to keep remembering it's one task at a time. One change at a time. Rembering who I was one part at a time and hitting reset.

I don't know...seems I just want to lay down and have a nice comfy nap in my wonderful squishy bed and a nice dream about Mr. Right. I'm sure he's out there somewhere...must be wondering around in a desert with out a compass or something. lol. None the less I'm going to resolve to have faith that he's out there...

Mondays

"If A is success in life, then A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut." ~ Albert Einstein

Meeting tomorrow at the corp office. ICK. Downside: It's pointless stupidity to go in to sign a piece of paper they could have mailed. Upside: Day away from the computer slavery PAID & a shopping trip on my way back!

The 'evil & demonic scale' says that I have gained back a pound. IT LIES. My stomach is flatter than last week.

I need to find a way to get myself to use that work out Gazelle on work days. It's so big that I can't leave it set up all the time. Orginally it was in my room, but then I'd do a mile ~ my attention would wander & off I'd go to answer the phone, or to see what my son needs, or whatever. So now I've rearranged the living room ~ put the furniture against the walls and put it out there. Folded against a bookshelf. I meant to use it after work today, but instead I've stared at it. The energy it takes to move it seems to be elsewhere - let alone use it.

Motivation or the lack thereof is really stopping my progress today. It's horrible that the only things keeping me from living the life I want are in my head! I guess that's always the case in life. Every thing is just in our minds, but it is frustrating when you know that and still can't figure out how to rewire the old brain.

Here's an idea. Tshirts that are personal adds. Why the hell not.

Demonic Scales & War

The demonic scale today says I've lost two pounds. Do I believe it? Not necessarily. It's like book reviews. You can't believe them - good or bad but you obsessively read them any way. What you believe is the experience - some one reads the book and says its wonderful. In the case of loosing weight that means putting on the jeans that didn't quite fit last month. The jeans aren't falling down to my thighs yet so I know I'm not there yet. I will hit 100lbs & size zero again!

Woke up to the news of the N. Korea missiles. Surreal. We're all characters in one of those movies you see on cable when you have the flu. You think Kim Jong-il saw those movies and decided to be the evil villian who takes over the world? Maybe he missed the fact that the villian gets his ass handed to him by a hard assed man? What the heck happens in a life that makes you want to be ''that guy''?

Wish I could be in DC today for the fireworks. Someday I'd like to take the trip there for the 4th. Happy 4th of July to all those heroes who are out of the country. My heart is with you, and I am ever mindful of your presence today. May you see home & family with a safe & healthy return soon.